The Big Ole Adventures of Cougar Maine – Infusing The Local Music Scene

Cougar hit record on the computer software and began his solo career He played the guitar, he sang his tune that he wrote "Big Ole Truck, Don't Give A Fuck" over and over again He played his guitar slowly, then picked up the pace
Knowing he had unlimited time to record, he just kept singing Cougar adding in some funny lines, like Big Ole Car, Big Ole Tank Big Ole Tanker, Big Ole Trucker, Big Ole Tin Can Car He giggled as he made fun of other vehicles as he praised his truck
His guitar play was consistent with a bunch of hammer ons mixed in After about 40 minutes of recording, Cougar stopped the session He saved the file, "Big Ole Truck, DGAF - Session 1" Then, set his guitar down and listened to his wonderous track
Cougar heard someone rustling around in the kitchen It was his Dad, he went out to ask him for a CD What for, asked his Dad Derrick Maine, what you got cookin? Cougar replied, come here and I'll show you what's for dinner
Derrick followed his musical auto mechanic creative son into his room Cougar hit open file, then play file for his Dad "Big Ole Truck, and I don't give a fuck" started playing Cougar turned up the volume as loud as the computer speakers would go
That's it? That's the song? Big Ole stupid truck 200 times? Did you write it about that piece of shit out there? Derrick pointed to the Big Ole Hulk Truck in the driveway Cougar nodded proudly, yes sir and she don't give a fuck Pops
Cougar hit stop on the file program What you think Pops? Pretty damn awesome tune right, asked Cougar No, it's downright awful, you should delete it Coug, said Derrick Delete this and Cougar flashed his Dad his middle finger
Freaking do nothing bum, yelled Derrick Cougar watched as his Dad left his room Then he remembered he had a book on computers that came with a CD He reached up on the shelf above his bureau to retrieve the book
Computing HTML-101 came with a blank CD in the front cover Cougar yelled, Ha Ha, and removed it and placed it into his computer He reopened the song file, then hit save to Drive D The Drive spun, the CD recorded his song, and Cougar was in business
He folded a piece of computer paper in half, then stapled the ends The folds made a CD jacket Then he drew a picture of the Big Ole Truck for the cover Here it is, exclaimed Cougar, my first CD for sale, who wants it?
Cougar decided to give his smoke stack amplifiers some love He hopped in the Big Ole Truck with his new CD Placed the CD into the radio control panel, hit play, and drove off The music billowed out of the smoke stacks all over his neighborhood
Now every man, woman, and child will hear my music Cougar drove nice and slow and blasted his song "Big Ole Truck, and It Don't Get Stuck" he sang along with the tune People started to stare and cringe and yell at Cougar.
Stay tuned for more Big Ole Adventures of Cougar Maine, as Cougar heads into town and over to his family’s grocery store on a busy Thanksgiving weekend shopping day. Will the town support this budding young musical talent or rebuff him with ridicule and distasteful remarks? We shall see very, very soon.
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